Thursday, April 27, 2006

What Do You Want To Hear?

I shared this story at bible study last night, but it just seems to be sticking around in my head. I figure that means I should write a blog entry just to get it out there.

I went up to Pennsylvania for a few hours to visit my friend Abby. She and I met during the Mississippi trip our youth group took last November. Honestly, she was quiet and we joked around a little but I certainly hit it off more with two other people, Dave and Amber, out of their group. Over time that has changed a lot. Time and God just keep throwing changeups when all we were expecting was a fastball.

Right now I talk to Amber and Dave every now and then, but have the good, regular conversations with Abby. While IM is a great way to talk, it just isn’t wonderful at getting to know someone. I knew Abby went to church and did some things even outside Sunday morning, but really had no idea where she fell relating to God (I still don’t think I know entirely).

When I first arrived we got to talking about this bible study called the 40 Day Revolution I’m leading at youth group. It’s all about showing the world the love God has for each one of us by going out of our way for other people and praying for their needs.

Monday was simply to color a rock and put it someplace you could see it. Tuesday’s “assignment” was to ask the people beside us in each class if there was anything we could pray about for them. When I write it, and when I present it, it just sounds like such an easy thing to do. Apparently I’m not so good when it comes to living it.

I was talking to Abby about the curriculum and started talking about the assignment from Tuesday. I don’t know whether Abby had look on her face or if it was my own insecurity, but I just really down-played the assignment. Heck, I even made it out to sound kind of silly… As though I was getting too religious or might put her off because of it.

On the ride home I was thinking about the good times we had, but this interaction kept nagging at me. I realized that this was an assignment completely out of my comfort zone and will be really hard to accomplish while looking someone in the eye.

I hold honesty to be a pretty important value in my life. I also tend to hold bluntness up there as well. Don’t say something that hints at what you’d like me to do, or what I have done wrong. Get it out there so we can discuss it head-on. I only ask that you be considerate of what I may be thinking and about how I may receive your honesty.

The last part there causes some of the problems for me. I am too blunt in some cases, often putting my foot in my mouth. Thankfully I am surrounded by forgiving people who see it as one of my peculiarities. Other times I will water down what I am saying so much that I’m really changing my point entirely, just because I think the other person won’t like or agree with what I have to say.

It happened yesterday talking to Abby. My own mind started thinking about this assignment and how she would receive it. I erred on the side of caution and took almost all of the “religion” out of it. I didn’t want her thinking I was weird or strange (which is funny since I really am weird AND strange). I just don’t want people to act a certain way with me because of my religious beliefs. I’d rather we all just be honest and comfortable with one-another while being open to listen to different ideas.

I had one of the most open and honest conversations with some of our youth last night during a small group discussion. We all opened up to one-another and really shared some of our heartaches in life. It’s that sort of honesty I want to be surrounded by. An honesty that is brutal, blunt and opens us to hurt. Conversations like these are what build a strong community. They build relationships that should last beyond the end of the week and into the changes phases of our lives.

For now all I can say is that I’ll be asking Abby what I can pray for in her life. I’ll also ask you, is there anything I can be praying for in your life?

Peace,
+Tom/Bob

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