Thursday, September 08, 2005

Are You Comfortable?

My friend and pastor Rob send out a link to a blog by another church leader, Kem Meyer. He has been putting up key points noted during a conference for leaders (specifically religious leaders) at Willow Creek.

The following point is made by Kenneth Ulmer, the Bishop at Faithful Central Bible Church:

We need to let go of the responsibility and success of what we’re doing and put it in God’s hands. Ultimately, if we’re on mission, we’ll be in an uncomfortable place. If we’re comfortable, it’s in our hand. Place it in God’s hand. Value is exponentially multiplied.

This statement seems to hit right about where I am in life. As some of you know, and all of you now, I will be starting the discernment process as a step to see where God really sees me fitting in this world (as a priest, or in some other area). Where I am right now is not where I should be.

More and more things are going on with youth group. I just realized what a blessing the morning is, from 7:30 - 8:30 most youth in Loudoun Country have some free time, since they wake up around 7 or 7:30 and school starts at 9. I would love to dedicate each morning to having coffee with one or two people (adults or youth) and just start off the day talking and praying together.

But then comes the many problems this causes. Getting into work much later (and I can't work late since we need to get Rachel from daycare), forcing my wife to get into work later, forcing me to get up earlier (and man do I hate that... heh heh, not really). Work is the main hindrance, how do I get paid for an 8 hour day when only working 6?

I also attended a Loudoun County youth leader's meeting yesterday. The meeting was awesome. But it went from 12 - 2:30. Thank goodness they only happen once a month. But it again cuts into work plans.

Here I am though, having coffee every now and then, going to youth leader meetings and going to at least 2 church events each week (and often 3 or 4). I'm considering working from home, to be able to work a more flexible schedule. This will definitely hinder my career growth, and right now I do need to keep working. I love our daughter Rachel, my wife Erin and (frankly) our home, we've put a lot into it and I'd hate to lose the pride I have in this place.

Things became even more confusing and uncomfortable since the church has decided (rightly so) that we are not ready to hire a youth minister full time. Now, I certainly wouldn't have even been guaranteed the job since there are far more experienced youth ministers out there (heck, am I really all that qualified?). but it would have been nice to figure out how to make finances work and dedicate my time, breakfasts, lunches, days and (some) evenings to furthering God's word.

God's plan for me is not long term youth ministry. He well knows that having the position I might get comfortable as a youth minister, letting things go and me becoming stolid in my ways. As I've mentioned earlier, God sure doesn't want me comfortable.

so, for now I continue to love, live, and question. There are great things in store for God's church, our youth group and this world. I thank Him for letting me have a pivotal role in those plans (when it boils down to it, all work we do for Him is pivotal and necessary).

Peace,
+Tom

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